So, I have to read a lot of books this year to achieve my goal of becoming a writer. I need to learn, and abstain knowledge to better back up my clams and ideas with tangible evidence. Yet, I'm procrastinating from reading by writing this blog post. I know avoiding one productive thing for another is a conundrum, or is it a juxtaposition? No, that's not the right word… structural procrastination. That's the word.

Optimising something that you're not currently doing is just procrastination. It's a great feel-good excuse for researching or outlining a business plan or structure. It tells the world, "Hey, I'm doing the thing," when in reality, we aren't doing the things at all. Because we are scared, we want to put it off as long as possible until we get all our ducks in a row, and we know every conceivable possible outcome before it even happens. And you know what? We all do this to some extent.

I'm not a writer, but that isn't going to stop me. Sure, I'm dyslexic, and have disabilities with how I hear and process the world. That shouldn't stop me; that shouldn't be a deterrent. It's such a massive wall in my way that I have to get over, and I will make it my superpower. Because to get over these mishaps will make me stronger and a better person for it. I'm not a writer, but damn it, that's not going to stop me.

Life is messy. We have all these things we want to do and accomplish while fighting this wonderful thing called procrastination. You know, doom scrolling and lazing on the couch, watching streaming services, which is fun, relaxing, and oh so good for the soul. Well, that's what we tell ourselves.

Life is messy because things happen that we don't expect, which keeps us on our toes/ Which in turn makes life interesting, and so very emotional. What would a week be like if I didn't dread running out of my food budget, to decide to walk to the grocery shops to save money so I could buy more food? Life would be easy, with no challenges and as a result, boring.

We can't help but compare ourselves to others; it's literally how we know where we stand in the world. If we can do certain things or if we belong in a certain group or place. People say that you shouldn't compare or judge others or yourself. But it is hardwired into our brains; it's biological, a social skill to keep us safe. But at the same time, it can be the detriment to our happiness and well-being. So how do we overcome something that is inherently human nature?

First off, our brains are an amazing organ whose solo job is to keep us alive. Knowing is the first step.

Do what makes you happy and stop oversharing. No one else is going to chase your dreams for you. You have to start doing what makes you happy, not what makes the people around you happy or proud. Because you can't do it for others, and external modifications like praise. You have to do it for yourself. You have to be content doing it even if no one else in the world sees you doing it or your accomplishments other than you.

I keep in mind that you can't change someone; you can only show them the way and hope they go down the right path. I'm not perfect, far from it, but I try. I reflect on my state of mind, my actions, and the emotions I feel. I question why I feel a certain way, what the cause is, and where it comes from. I also strive to improve myself, both physically and mentally. However, lately, I've noticed that my body needs more attention than it's been getting.

It's not your fault. It's not your fault that you can't get any work done because the TV is more interesting. It's not your fault you can't read; TikTok is more entertaining. It's not your fault that you are unhealthy; the bag of chips is too enticing. Some people would say it is your fault, but I'm saying it's not. Our brains want to do the easy thing. We want fun and relaxation. So what are we to do when there are all these distractions and enticements?

The self-help space can be toxic but also damaging when you get advice that doesn't work for you. There is a huge divide between neurotypical people and neurodivergent's. Knowing which one you are will help you consider if an approach to bettering yourself and your life is productive or even viable. So, what can we do to better ourselves without damaging ourselves?

The way I see it is that first, we need to find out what kind of person we are and how we work. Knowing if you're neurodivergent or neurotypical can help a lot.

How to read more and read better. This is going one of the top goals in our lives; most people want to read more or wish they read more, we want to obtain more knowledge. We think that reading will better ourselves, help us in some way. And it can, but I also say if you hate reading, it's a slog, super hard like pulling teeth, then you might be reading the wrong things. So how can we read more and better?

If you ever sacrifice the internal for the external, you are going to make yourself miserable. We think that external things will bring us happiness. And it's not our fault; we have all been lied to and tricked into thinking this way. Through capitalism, advertising, and commerce, these things make our world work. Without a social system, we dive into chaos. The only thing is, if we ever figure out that we don't need stuff to be happy, then the whole system collapses.

It's interesting how we think that if a certain number of people like our work, we will be happy. We think that if I wear these clothes and put on this perfume, I will attract the perfect person into our lives. We think that if I have this, then this will happen in my life. But the truth is that advertisements are empty promises. If we look closely at them, they don't promise anything; they are a future endeavor that doesn't exist.

We live in a day where we have an endless amount of choices. So many, in fact, that it can become overwhelming and debilitating to a point. Just this idea for the younger generation to pick a career path is beyond overwhelming compared to millennials. When we were kids, you could choose a doctor, lawyer, electrician, etc. In today's job market, you can be all those things and more—a race car Uber driver, a copywriter that only reviews baby products, to a person that films themselves sleeping. It's stupid and great and also a paradox because the more choices we have, the more we feel like we made the wrong choice when there are so many options.

This paradox of choice is this idea that the more choices you have, the better, right?